Andromeda Spaceways Inflight Magazine [July Aug 2006] Issue 24

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stained clothes and tsking at my donkey. They didn t have to direct me. When I got to
the room where we d eaten so many dinners, my Beast was already waiting for me.
I did not invite you, said the Beast by way of greeting.
You didn t have to. I belong here.
Joshua, you are mortal, and I& am not, quite.
I pulled out my puzzle book and flipped back to the end. Problem, I wrote,
reading my writing out loud, Match up mortality for Joshua and Beast. She bared
her fangs in amusement. It was the most beautiful thing I d ever seen. If you send me
away again, I can come to find you again. If I was still your snot-nosed boy apprentice,
I couldn t have gotten this far.
Perhaps not, she said.
You never said you didn t love me, I said. You said you didn t want me as a
callow youth. And now I spread my hands to indicate my patched, stained robe. I
have traveled half the world for you.
For yourself, she said.
For us both. I have seen things you don t know. And you
All right, she said. All right! You win. You know where your rooms are. Dinner
is at the usual time.
And the servants, will they& ?
Appear? She laughed. I don t think they want to. No one can stop them, but&
one gets used to being invisible.
Get unused to it, I said.
Bones
& Stephanie Campisi
Jesus Christ, mate! There s a bloody skeleton on our dunny!
It s a toilet. And piss off. Skeleton, my arse. It wasn t in the property
description, was it?
I shit you not. Look.
Christ! Well, bugger me!
Jesus, don t touch it! See? I told you.
How the hell did it get into our toilet?
Dunno. Reckon he died on the crapper?
Bloody looks like it, doesn t it. Wait& He? Why d you say he?
Do you see any tits? It s a he.
Tits? It s a bloody skeleton! Christ, mate, and you d reckon the landlord
might ve noticed a Goddamn skeleton on the toilet, don t you think?
Ah, you know what landlords are like. He probably added it into the rent.
Well, what are we going to do with it?
You re the one who s so keen to touch it. Pick him up.
Pick him up? What if it s a crime scene or something?
Maybe you should ve thought of that before you pulled his finger off.
I can put it back on.
Look let s just lock the door and leave him to it. Maybe he ll go away by
himself.
What? Like our bladders? Where the hell are we meant to pee?
As long as it s in a straight line, I really don t give a crap.
Yeah, righto. Well, I ll go down to Safeway and get a bucket.
M�
He s still there.
Gee. Strange, that.
Here, put this on him. We can t have him catching a chill, can we?
What s with the beer?
Thought I d take some happy snaps. Do you reckon he can hold on to it?
Dunno. Fosters? Don t give a dead man Fosters. Bloody cruel.
Well, it s not like he s got any taste buds, is it?
Yeah, and that crap s probably what killed him in the first place. Give him a
real beer. A hair-on-chest kinda beer.
25
Bones
Nah. He s keeping the Fosters. Nobody else is gunna drink it. Here we go, Bonesy,
grab ahold of this.
Hey, gross! He s got fingernails now.
Oi, don t get all girly-girly on me.
Shut up. Just take your photos and get on with it.
Wait a sec& how d you stick his finger back on?
What do you mean stick his finger back on ? I ve got his finger right here in my
isi
pocket
That s feral! I can t believe you re carrying that thing around.
I thought it might be good luck or something. Like a rabbit s foot.
Well, there s plenty where that one came from. He s got ten fingers, all attached,
and everything. It s bloody grown back.
Bloody hell& mate, just take your damn pictures and lock the door.
M�
Bud-dum bud-dum bud-dum.
Huh?
He s got a heart. How cool is that? It s just like hanging there in his guts.
Hearts don t hang in your guts.
Whatever. It s beating. Check it out.
Gory. Dunno why he d bother with a heart. He hasn t even got arteries.
Maybe he needs to take a shit.
What? Jesus, you re a knob. Anyway, he doesn t have an arse, either. [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]

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